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Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-Free] Dinner Party | Client Spotlight

I met with a new client last week. Like many of my clients, she’s a mom, but unlike most of my other mommy clients, her kids stopped calling her mommy awhile ago. With all three kids at college, she called ready to start a new stage in her life – a stage that involved finally entertaining in her beautiful kitchen. Her goal was to learn to throw a dinner party, something she had never ever done before. I on the other hand cannot count the number of dinner parties I’ve thrown or helped throw. Bringing friends and sometimes strangers together in the kitchen, providing them with a simple but delicious meal, seeing bottles of wine evolve into laughter, ever more amusing conversation, and sometimes even impromptu music jam sessions – these moments have been the heart of my life, so I was pretty excited to help this client create these very memories in her own home.

While I’ve gotten dinner party throwing down to a science (believe me it’s as much science as art), it wasn’t always this way. I still remember the debacle of my first dinner party. I was 20 and had just returned from a summer in Florence. So excited to share the Italian dishes I had enjoyed at restaurants, I invited 3 friends over to my parents house. Menu choice was my biggest mistake. I picked a high-maintenance dish that I had never made before. As my friends arrived, I had only par-cooked risotto that had ballooned in size, though volume clearly had nothing to do with flavor, which this pot of mush completely lacked. I also decided to make a cheesecake, another dish I had never made before. I remember watching my friends pick at the dishes, my ego completely deflated.

Luckily, I’ve learned a lot since then, and I’m so glad I didn’t throw in the towel after that first bad incident. Here’s how I approach dinner party throwing now:

Pick the right menu


  • Select recipes that you’ve cooked before
  • Select recipes that can be done mostly ahead of time and then “finished” at the last minute quickly (quick sautes) or passively (like in the oven)
  • Keep it simple. Maybe choose one “wow” factor dish or learn to make one or two tasty sauces / vinaigrettes that will up the flavor of any dish

Make a plan


  • Make a schedule (especially important for novices). You can go as far as a detailed spreadsheet or simply jot down what needs to be done so you don’t forget something
  • The sequence of events I typically follow are: 1) Prep everything and then clean so your kitchen isn’t a disaster when guests arrive; 2) Set the table; 3) Get out all necessary serving dishes; 4) Shower and primp! That way you’ll be so fresh and so clean when guests arrive

Remember the *why*


  • Remember the company is more important than fancy food. A night of awesome food that requires you to slave inside the kitchen all night is not a successful dinner party. Your friends could have just gone to a restaurant on their own to not get to see you
  • If you need to ask for a little help to bring it all together (e.g., a pre-mixed cocktail, an appetizer / dessert contribution), don’t hesitate. Your friends are happy to help (and if they aren’t, you need new friends)

All this advice applied


The menu for the last dinner party I threw (a small little weeknight one last week) was Pureed Asparagus and Corn Soup with English Peas * Arugula Salad with Peaches and Corn * Bakeed Salmon with a Green Onion Vinaigrette * Orzo with Tomato Basil Sauce. I had made all these dishes many times before, and most of the labor could be done ahead of time. Because I had made everything before, I also knew how long it would take me to cook everything. Our friends were arriving at 7:30, and I knew I needed about 45 minutes to prep, 30 minutes to get ready, and about 10 minutes to finish things up, which meant I started prepping around 6. During prep time, all chopping was done and I cooked as much could be done ahead of time. I also tried to clean up as much as I could since we have an open kitchen. Everything was then grouped together by dish, so I could efficiently finish things off after I got ready.
The soup was cooked and left to cool for pureeing. English peas were sauteed and sat next to the pot.
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
The salad was all put together, with the dressing ready next to it.
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
For the salmon, I had pre-marinated the fillets and had them set out on a baking sheet, all ready to go in the oven, which I had pre-heated. My plan was bake the salmon (10 minutes at 400 degrees) while we were all enjoying our soup. The reason for the green onion vinaigrette was because if I had any issues with the salmon, such as overcooking, I could remedy it with a really tasty sauce.
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
The orzo was another simple make-ahead. The orzo had boiled to al dente, and all the ingredients for the sauce could be sauteed in 10 minutes, right before guests came and kept warm. I made sure to get everything chopped up – tomatoes, basil, and garlic – and the pan ready to go.
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
Though I cleaned everything else off the countertops, I like to leave a small cutting board and knife out just in case I forget something
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
Now it was time to set the table set. I like to fancy up the water with whatever I have on hand. On this evening, it was cucumber and lime (and good thing I had that cutting board still out to slice them up!)
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
And before I hit the shower and got dressed, I also got out all the serving dishes I was planning on using for the meal – a platter for the salmon and a bowl for the orzo. Both are beautiful wedding gifts by Heath Ceramics
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
6:45: Off to shower and primp before guests arrive
7:15: Final touches – puree soup and keep on low heat, dress salad, make tomato / basil sauce for orzo (salmon gets put into oven during soup course)
The final products:
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
Tips for How to Throw a [Fabulous / Stress-free] Dinner Party | Cook Smarts by Jess Dang
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1 Comment

  1. Sarah May 16, 2012 Reply

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